Editorial Living

Catherine had never seen black balls before. She was in love.

Tommy and Marissa fought for hours about where to stack the new china.

Ever since the We Network stopped showing new episodes of “Bridezilla”, Josh and Kelly really had nothing else to do.

Patty thought that her professor’s “extra credit” requirements seemed rather odd, but she really needed that A- to get into a good law school.

Despite what Mme. Wintour seems to think, “Louboutin” is NOT a major food group.

Jasmine was so lonely that she took to cavorting with the stock room’s only other inhabitants. They didn’t seem to mind.

“I…A..M…K..I..M’..S…B..I..T..C..H..!”

bbook:

She’s going to come with a tiny version of The Fountainhead, and she’s going to be an asshole. “There is not a person in New York City who should be allowed to live in this dreamhouse,” she’ll say if you press her back. Also, “If you want my advice, Peter, you’ve made a mistake already. By asking me. By asking anyone. Never ask dolls. Not about your work. Don’t you know what you want? How can you stand it, not to know?” And if you put her in a drawer she’ll build something to set herself free, and then hiss at you from the opened drawer, “You know that I hate you, [your name]. I hate you for what you are, for wanting you, for having to want you. I’m going to fight you — and I’m going to destroy you … I will hurt you through the only thing that can hurt you — through your work. I will fight to starve you, to strangle you on the things you won’t be able to reach. I have done it to you to today — and that is why I shall sleep with you tonight.” It’s going to be pretty upsetting actually.

Architect Barbie to Be a Barbie at Last | The Hairpin

Filed Under: Reasons to Love Edith Zimmerman

I can’t even. This is too funny.

-What did you think of little Gracie’s math teacher?

-She was nice. Her sweater was cute.

-Do we need any more milk?

-No, but I do think we’re out of onions.

-Ok.

-I’ll pick some up on the way home from the office tomorrow.

-Great, thanks babe. Smoochies.

While the rest of her summer camp enjoyed their lunch, Georgina practiced fruitlessly, trying to master the “C” in the “Y.M.C.A” dance for the end of summer talent show.

Vanessa struggled in vain to fend off her ferocious pet rock attackers.

This is Edna a few moments before she realizes that yes, we are definitely laughing at her, not with her.

novh:

Fucking shit up.

(Source: cavetocanvas, via novh)

-ROBIN?!

-…

-ROBIN!!

-…

-ROOOOBBBINNN!!!!

-…

-STOP SCREWING AROUND! I CAN TOTALLY SEE YOU HIDING BEHIND THAT PLANT - GET DOWN HERE!!

-…

-THIS CAMEL WON’T RETURN ITSELF! IF I HAVE TO PAY A LATE FEE I’M GONNA BE SO PISSED.